Heart Trouble

Part of Saturday's bonanza. 

Will it actually provide a real actual cure to heart trouble which isn't some kind of bait-and-switch Jesus related rubbish? Hit the jump to find out

RTAP Lives

Sorry for the unannounced pause in content. I needed a week off. I'll give some forewarning if I ever do that again. Have a new background image to make up for it :3

Back to it then.

This one was found last Saturday on Sauchiehall Street. It was being handed out by a group of preachers standing in front of a "JESUS IS LORD" banner with a cross made of bible verses printed on it. Not that they're over the top or anything.

Crucifying a guy outside Forbidden Planet

Back when I started collecting tracts, this was one I would find quite often. It's a plug for what I guess is a relatively new-ish church. Its members pop up every so often in the city centre to preach to folks, always handing out the same one or two tracts each time. On one occasion, they even staged a crucifixion re-enactment in the middle of Buchanan Street. I found the video and it's just past the jump.

also lol papyrus font.

OMIGOD IT'S JACK CHICK!

 So I was in town with some peeps today, and at about 1 o-clockish on Buchanan Street, we saw a guy with ridiculous hair and beard wielding a sign reading "For what profit a man should he gain the whole world but lose his own soul." Seeing that he was handing out tracts, my first instinct of BACK AWAY FROM THE CRAZY ended up being overridden by my blog-updating urge to go up and ask for one, after I looked at it for about half a second before I couldn't contain myself and found myself yelling "OH MY GOD IT'S JACK CHICK" incredibly loudly.
Slight overreaction I admit, but holy fuck damn it's a fucking Chick Tract I LOVE these things. They are like beautiful little pocket train wrecks of theology. Okay okay I know I covered one of these before at the very start of this blog, but this is TOTALLY different. For starters I'm going to cover the whole thing rather than just highlights, and two it's not a soggy copy which has been penned on.

SO we have some proper Chick coverage today folks. JUMP AWAAAAYYYY!

Bible verse spam attack.

Found in a phone box in Argyle Street. Yet another one from the Evangelical Tract Association.

Hit the jump for the back

One for the kids

Found this one on Saturday on the ground on Gordon Street. Unfortunately it was too soggy to open and I just binned it. By sheer luck, divine providence, or the fact that the same people had hit a few phone boxes that day, I found it in a different phonebox on the way to work the next morning.

Hit the jump for the inside. I think it's probably important to note at this point that this tract was WRITTEN FOR CHILDREN!

The Gospel in manly pink

This one crops up in a phone box on the way to work every so often.

Also it is pink.

Hit the jump...

*checks watch* Yup. Seems the world is STILL just about to end ANY time now

Something that someone typed up in MS Word, printed onto an A4 sheet of paper, then left on a bench in Sauchiehall street one fine Saturday afternoon.... I guess.

Hit the jump to unfold.

London Break

Last month, I partook in a family trip to London for a couple days. On our last night there, there was a guy standing on a stool in Leicester Square, yelling at nobody in particular about how they were doomed to hell, and handing out copies of this very tract. Of course, I took one off him. He asked me if I was a Christian, to which I replied in the negative.

The tract itself is classic scare-you-into-converting material. Hit the jump.

I.Q. Test

Found on the corner of Buchanan Street and Sauchiehall street on 7th Aug.
It, and a bunch of other ones I picked up, was being handed out by a group of people who were alternating between singing happy-clappy Jesus songs, and yelling about the fires of hell at passers by. Don't you just love delicous mood-whiplash?

This one reminds me of the dodgy ad banners which present ridiculously common optical illusions, along with some answer tickboxes which make the answer incredibly obvious in a lame attempt to make you click the banner and drag you on to their site. It's more or less the same principle here.

Go ahead and hit the
the jump for more...

Life is Short. Eternity is not.

CHAPTER AND VERSE PLZ!

Here's one I picked up recently. Just this Saturday to be exact. This one was left lying on a bench on Gordon Street, just outside the bank. There were a few more strewn about, so I guess there were some folks handing these out before I arrived on the scene.

I'm sure I've seen a pic of this same phrase on an American billboard somewhere. There's kind of a trend on American Preachy Billboards to just have a short snappy, almost "hip" sounding phrase, and stick " - GOD" next to it in some kind of cynical attempt to make God sound more...down-to-earth I guess. There's another one I've seen a couple times which says "Let's all meet at my house Sunday before the game. -God." They don't really get less lame over time.

Hit the jump for the back.

Jack Chick's Titanic

Found in 2008, on Bath Street (on the bridge over Queen Street Station)

By no means is this the first religious pamphlet I ever came across in the history of ever, but it is the one which inspired me to start keeping the ones I come across, in the event of finding more gems of hilarity. I have been familiar with the work of Jack Chick for a long time, and it's pretty safe to say that this particular tract - which exploits a major tragedy in a somewhat cynical bid to win souls - is one of Chick's tamer works.

I haven't uploaded all of this one, since it's already freely available on Chick's website, but I HAVE uploaded a couple of pages for reasons which will become evident after the jump.

..... so go ahead and hit the jump